Don't get me wrong. I'm super social. There is hardly anything that I love more than meeting people. I mean, I was a Junior Officer and am now Student Body Officer to a 5A school. Yes, I love my social life.
But recently something changed inside of me. I've always loved talking one-on-one, but I've never really appreciated it like I do now. Going to big parties doesn't really appeal to me at the moment. And not just because it's 11:49 at night, but because I love individual time!
So what changed? Good question. I don't know the answer. I think it's mainly because I really want to get to know people; I don't want to have just casual chit-chat. I want to share my thoughts and I want to be able to converse. I have this really incredible friend named Katie. She is such a blessing in my life. She is the easiest person to talk to. I honestly don't think I've ever shared so many thoughts with anyone as I've shared with Katie. And the thing is, she has the most incredible insight on everything. It is nice to have friends who appreciate individual time and make the best of it.
My testimony and love for the Gospel has increased so much the past week months. This increase of knowledge has really made me reflect more on my life. I believe that is a portion of the reason why I want individual time. The Spirit can be felt so much more strongly in a setting with a few people, whereas being surrounded by people isn't always the most spiritual time (except for at church and stuff...but I'm talking about parties). Here is an experience that happened two weeks before school got out.
I had been at a party or somewhere with several friends. When I got home I for some reason felt really lonely. I knew I had friends, but I felt like I had none. I remember crying so hard as I said a very long prayer to the very best friend I have ever had. I asked Him why I felt that way. I asked Him to show His love and show me that He really does care. I don't remember everything that I said, but it was long. The next day was a Sunday. Church was great. After church I took a nice nap outside. When I woke up, I went inside and found a note addressed to me on the kitchen counter. I read through it several times because it seemed so unreal. My dear friend Marissa had written an anonymous note (my sister was in the tree when she dropped it off) that comforted me beyond belief. She addressed everything I had prayed about the night before. Later that night I received another anonymous note that was very simple, but it let me know that I am loved. The next day another dear friend wrote me a note and gave me incredible advice. The point of this story is to testify that the Lord has an eye on us. He cares about us more that we could ever fathom. I am blessed with incredible friends who follow the promptings of the Spirit and wrote me notes when I needed it most. They probably didn't even realize they were following promptings of the Holy Ghost.
Experiences like that one have brought me closer to my Heavenly Father. I have been more filled with the Spirit, and more desirous to be available when He needs me to help someone. I guess I don't really know if I've ever helped someone out by the anonymous notes I write, but I like to think that I'm guided to write notes to those specific friends for a reason.
Back to my original point, remember that parties are great, but try spending some one-on-one time. You'll probably grow a lot closer to your friends that way.
Kira
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